Gordian Knot

Logically as you get older first time things happen less often, but every so often they still happen. Last week, and for the first time in my adult life, I was told by a young and bored looking girl at Paris’s Charles de Gaul airport that I had to...

Enough is Enough.

Statistics are wonderful. They can tell you the likelihood that action A caused outcome B. They can tell you anything and everything. With enough data, statistics can rationally explain the past and also reasonably predict the future. Statistics are therefore magic. They are also rather dull. Statistics are the...

First World Problems

I had a revelation the other day. The catalyst for this revelation came in a barber shop. A Turkish barber shop. It was a pleasant Saturday afternoon. Middle eastern MTV blared out as young men with beards went about their business wielding buzzing trimmers and cut throat razors. It...

Killing Time

Recently I had some time to kill and thought what better way to do so but with a popcorn, pick n mix, alien invasion flick? I don’t watch a lot of television but when I do I tend to choose it specifically rather than channel flick randomly wasting time....

Coffee & Underpants

Its Christmas day, 7pm. I’m cuddling my 5-year-old daughter on the couch and watching the movie Elf. The dwarf scene with Will Ferrell and Peter Dinklage has just come on. Daughter: ‘Daddy is he real, really real? Not movie real.’ Me: ‘Who him?’ I ask, pointing at Peter Dinklage....

A cup of post truth tea

Last week. 10km up. Somewhere over Europe. The seatbelt sign has disappeared and I’m pretending to work on my laptop as two metal trollies slowly work a stop-start pincer manoeuvre from the front and back towards my middle-of-the-plane seat. The captain informed us earlier that it will only take...

Napoleon

A wise old pig called Napoleon famously once said that all animals are created equal, but some are more equal than others. George Orwell lifted part of this directly from the fledgling United States of America’s declaration of Independence, a document which was written well before independence had actually...

A walk in the mall

Skinny vs. regular jeans is a discussion for which I have nothing to add. Fashion as a subject, is a bit like quantum physics to me, I know absolutely nothing about it and have even less of an inclination to spend anytime finding out about it. From the outside...

Eating a Turtle

When I was a wee boy I used to be a bit of a fussy eater. Not one of those dull, modern day invented, lactose intolerant, vegan types, just a common or garden fussy food child. I remember turning my nose up when my mother first put a pizza...

The Gruffalo

What matters more, feelings or facts? A week or so ago I turned a corner and forty years old disappeared from my rear view mirror, looming ahead of me front and center is fifty. I don’t feel forty-six. I don’t even know what forty-six should feel like which probably makes...